fields containing pearls
lie beneath our feet and wait
for full hearts to dig

thrift town

i was thinking today about the trickle down process of all good objects we own. you buy something new in the store. you use it for a while, and if it doesn't break and you don't need it any more, you may pass it on to a friend. or if you're looking to make a little cash back on the deal, you may try to sell it. craigslist or ebay may get you top dollar, and if you're just not into all the work it takes to do this, it might sit in a garage or storage unit until one day, in a fit of purging it may end up on a table or blanket at a garage sale. here is where the bargain hunters prowl.
or, it may end up at the local thrift store as a donation, because it's just that much easier to get rid of things than to sell them. in fact sometimes the thrift store looks like a big estate sale. and it is here that i have enjoyed many hours just walking the aisles browsing the discarded treasures.
i once went looking for a bowling shirt, and found the entire team selection represented. it was here that i began slowly building my atari 2600 lot, one game at a time for about 95 cents apiece. smoking jackets, fezz hats, harmonicas, old frigidaires, polaroid cameras, vintage t-shirts, ties, 60's office chairs, framed art, school globes, and all manner of tchotchke have been spotted, handled and most times brought home from here on expeditions over the years.
and even when nothing is procured, there's still a good feeling that no time has been wasted after leaving empty handed. for the other thing it satisfies is that voyeuristic desire to open up other people's closets and go through them for a while. and so, even today after thinking about my walkman post and missing the intimacy of analog cassette technology, a quick trip to thrift town produced for me this lucky find. a vintage 1985 wm-f12! sure, it may lack the glamour of the sexier wm-10, but i adore this clunky little find. and for $3.95, it surely was a deal. (listening to a little tribe called quest even as i write this) amazing to me that it was sitting there waiting for me today. as if when it began its journey in the factory in japan some 28 years ago, making its way through the trickle down, it knew it would make its way into my hands today. so get out there while the deals can still be found. pearls be awaiting ;^)

trading the lush green
pastures for a higher place
to make rest today

reminded today that the pacific is ever closer than it used to be. and although it is nice to be in the high country from which the melting snows turn into streams, they all ultimately find their way back here. and even as this glass has been changed and re-shaped, i too have been changed as i work my way back to it. may it be for the better.

he held his poker
face while demon wings fluttered
all around his head

(happy chinese new year...belated)

winning

again last night we found ourselves at the arena (no this isn't turning into an nba blog) courtesy of some last minute tickets that found their way into our hands. i was a little leery about putting the heartstrings out there again to get tugged on by the local team. we didn't dominate like we had through 3 quarters monday night against memphis. and as i settled in to watch the up and down, back and forth tilt, where neither team really broke away i attempted to remain neutral.
but of course as the final minute ticked down, with our team holding on to a two 3 pointer lead, it was nervous time. fortunately the guys buckled down and held off the blazers to win it by 8. and later as we were on our way out and back home, somebody asked me where the visiting team would go from here. i explained that after the obligation of press conferences and clean up they would be on a plane out of our town and on to the next stop.
and as i pondered this fact and the reality of the nba as this traveling circus, i thought about what that must mean to so many other fans. fans in those one horse sport towns like memphis, oklahoma city, portland and sacramento. for them the arena is an ever changing window display of the out of town stars on parade. kids wait all year to see their heroes come into town and then find themselves in a quandary as to whether to root for kobe or not. it is however, always good to be the home team.

life calls ups and downs
and drags us to mid court to
make another play

deflated

i had a chance to get back to the coliseum last night for a warrior game with my lovely bride. it's so nice to be one stop away on bart. in fact, it took us longer to get through the security entrance then to get to the game (a first) but once inside it felt worth the trouble. although not a full house on a monday night, the place was still rocking, and as the w's built up a 20 point lead late in the 3rd quarter, there were good feelings all around.

but as the 4th got underway, so too did the wheels come off for the home team. they proceeded to give the game away as the memphis grizzlies rattled off 39 points in the 4th to top their output for the first half. our collective mood around the arena quickly fizzled into disbelief. golden state of course dropped this one by one, and as we walked back to catch our train i wondered why it is that we get drawn in as fans, and then let down by heartbreak. certainly the loss didn't ruin my wife's evening, if anything i added a black cloud to an otherwise lovely night out. so why is it that we let the game get beyond its proper parameters of entertainment and diversion? i mean i wasn't the one who coughed up that 20 point lead, and most likely those guys got over that loss far quicker than i did. still, i think i need to re-examine my investment emotionally the next time around, because the price of admission is just too high.

lifted high by fairy
dust and wonderful thoughts
about you today

(happy birthday ellie!)

sitting on top of the world today.

the evidence of
rendezvous emptied into
vanished consciousness

matchbook stories 05

one of the things i really love about our new matchbook collection is this intersection of history, art and often times cartography. latest case in point is this recent discovery in our ash can of treasures. the steak block restaurant no longer exists as such. a little detective work led me to the conclusion that it now operates as a mexican eatery known as "caso robles" or oak house roughly translated.
and although i was supplied with an address on the cover of this matchbook, it did not seem to match up to anything on google maps. but as i took a closer look at the tiny illustrated map inside the cover i began to put the clues together. the alignment had changed over the years and old peralta blvd had become mowry avenue. this was confirmed by an additional sighting of a later matchbook version turned up here on ebay. and as i looked closer at the architectural details i became convinced this was the place.


and this is what i love. the mystery of this long forgotten dining locale revealed through the artist's hand on a crude map. interestingly to me as well, this little haven happens to be a block from my old neighborhood. it was there that my wife and i first settled in a little cottage and i would regularly walk right past it on late night walks with my neighbor and bosom friend. and although the laughter of the old place has faded and the conversation may have turned to espanol, i am again reminded that i am back where life was lived for me here so long ago, and is again.

the stars of yesterday
now abandoned as
orphan technology

member review

so first, a little background. i like so many others came to the netflix as a disgruntled movie lover tired of paying those ridiculous late fees, which as i understand it was also the impetus for the creation of the company. although it took some getting used to (no more instant gratification in running down to the rental store for that quick hit) i soon became accustomed, and then fell madly in love with the company. and in fact it really felt there for a while like we were all of us sticking it to the man as we watched the video rental giants began to topple. (hard to believe as a former blockbuster employee that they once sponsored a college bowl game) and there was a certain elegant control i know i felt when checking in to my work computer the morning after putting that red envelope in the mail. reviewing and then reordering the queue. a mystical pleasure at finding hidden treasures on dvd while i sipped that morning cup o' coffee. and it seemed like our love affair would go on and on, even as the number of movies in my queue grew longer than a year of days.
then tragedy. first the great recession hit the reset button on all non-essential expenditures (i know, like film watching isn't essential?) which killed all media in our home for a time. and although initially a bitter and jagged little pill, the hiatus ultimately proved quite positive. i realized how much time i was wasting night after night, sitting mindlessly in front of the tube. (and yes, it was still a tube) then i discovered the local library, and learned to work the system, gaining access to the entire placer county library network. i was singing the praises of our great shared institutions of learning. but after about a year my folks kicked in with a one year gift subscription to the old netflix. sure, it was only a 1 disc, unlimited streaming, and not our old 3 at a time, but it was nice to be back. i'd missed the familiarity of the queue. and although i had knocked off quite a few in the interim, the access to the new releases was a plus.
but something had happened in the absence. where i used to jump on the new releases, as if there was some limited shelf life to them, the thrill of the hunt was gone now. it just didn't matter like before. and if this was art after all, wouldn't it keep indefinitely? and i certainly wasn't riding the zeitgeist any more. i mean i'm just a regular dude. it's not like i work for the ny times or something.
the following year the folks re-upped our subscription, and it was during this period the company made its fateful decision to separate the streaming and disc plans, basically doubling the price for many of their loyal followers. we who know the story, remember what happened next. a spiral of members walking away in feelings of disgust and betrayal as netflix watched its value drop by nearly half. (hmm, double your price - lose half your customers) we were still grandfathered in under our subscription, and i wondered what our plan of action should be once it expired.
now here we are, just a few days in to paying for the same plan, and i just don't know how to feel. on one hand i too wanted to join the angry mob and walk out on my former lover. i had been wooed away from blue to red. i'd learned the fight song, preached its good news, and now i felt no love returned. but as i have weighed all the options in recent days, it seems that some of my fire has smoldered. when i think of how much i used to spend on cable tv, and how little i got back in return, it's easy. and going back to the all free route, although tempting, takes a lot of work. and for less than 20 bucks a month i am getting access to quite a bit of film and tv archive. so, although i no longer go out and rah rah anymore for netflix, at the end of the day i'm giving them a solid 3 stars for like. (but look out red, something better comes along and it was nice knowin' ya :^)

the sparks fly upwards
and send our dreams as letters
on kite strings to God

hangar one

i was sitting at my desk the other day, when i spotted this heading our way. so bizarre to see it coming out of the east. we never saw them when we lived up in sacramento. and it made me think about the glory days of the original airships. i wondered what it must have been like to be in a farm field somewhere in europe, and then to look up and see this giant silent monster bearing down on you.

this one belongs to the hangar one vodka people and has been on a 30+ city tour. the blimp is housed nearby and must have been heading back to home base the day i spotted it. i understand that they book flights back and forth between sf and la. how cool. i wonder what it would be like to float up there suspended in the sky...

finding my rest today on the day of it...

our days are the path
of choices only a
penitent man will pass

out tomorrow. ring if you need anything...

sign of the times

i rode by the old bal theater the other night. the moon was nearly full and the city lights were beginning to dominate the landscape. in that brief moment as i passed i looked up and saw on the marquee that our very own little bal is hosting an upcoming "psychotronic film festival". it made me smile as i motored on down the old 185.
all during my growing up years the grand old dame sat vacant. during the dot-com boom a couple made rich by the tech surge bought the old gal and made a go of it showing second run features and hosting the occasional rave (for which the cops busted them more than once) and then she went silent again.
upon our return i went by and it looked like she was making a second (or third) act. all through the holidays they hosted comedy events and good time old movies. and now it looks like they're delving into the wonderful world of the super cool, super geeky b movie mash up. you've come a long way baby!

as day shifts to night
we lose our ties and wind down
the reel to reel

analog

at thanksgiving my cousin asked if i had seen the movie "super 8". i had not. she then told me how much it reminded her of me. curious, i got around to seeing it over the weekend, and though i wasn't crazy about it, i did enjoy taking a little time machine trip through the landscape of my youth. seeing a walkman in the movie reminded me about all of the "personal stereos" i had picked up over the years. back in the day sony was the gold standard, but there were others. i once picked up an aiwa because the sales guy said "s' got sony guts".

but my finest purchase in the field was undoubtedly back in '84 when i somehow managed to drop a hundred bucks for the wm-10, the world's smallest cassette player. without a tape inside it was as big as a cassette cover. and as i thought about this little marvel of the age, and all my fond memories of sporting it on ski trips and walking to and from school listening to big country and duran duran, i wanted to geek out a little more and went looking for any information i might find on the world wide internet.

and of course the triple w did not let me down, as i uncovered some great archival sites deicated to all things pre-digital. chief among them is walkman central, an exhaustive portal to some fine sony machinery. and as i perused my new found love interest, one thing leapt out at me. sony was the apple of its day. as i read some of the more technical achievements for each model i really got this sense that these guys were pushing the envelope wider and wider with each successive model. as problems occurred, they looked for ways to solve them and they did, again and again. and even as the shift from cassette to cd began, sony was still at the forefront of development and technology.

sadly then, it is difficult to understand why they were so soundly defeated once the shift again moved us from cd to mp3 technology. i mean they had it all. the design and manufacturing departments, research and development, marketing, even a solid link to the music business through their publishing label. so why did little apple which had never before delved into the music market become not only the spoiler, but the only dominant force in making these little music sticks that we all carry around now? in a word, simplicity. as sony added more and complexity to their devices, apple just made it simple. but looking at that old wm-10 reminded me that they once knew how to do that really well too.

never forget that
life comes from above even
as we stoop below

soul's home

on a recent trip to golden gate park my wife took the above photo. as she was editing it for her own bloggie i was struck by something i had read recently. the author as he moved through differing landscapes began to connect them to people he knew. the deserts reminded him of the ones who on the surface appeared reserved and dry, though the real life within them remained hidden. the lush green landscapes where leaves grew large reminded him of the ones who took every bit of life in. as i reflected on this a little i liked the idea of landscapes as people, although i honestly believe we all move through each one at different seasons in our lives. people spend time up in the mountains, but eventually come back down to live in the valleys. and despite all of our best efforts to remain lush and watered, we all most certainly have made trips through the desert. i guess the lesson here is to know the metaphysical terrain you're navigating in the moment and to respond accordingly. it's easy to move through the green pastures and along still waters that restore our souls. a little more difficult walking through valleys with the shadow of death hanging over.

we move from here to
there all the while looking back
over our shoulders

small houses 08

location: hwy 49, north of placerville
rolling through the golden chain highway from auburn to placerville and following a 5 dollar guidebook of the finest roads in america some 5+ years ago, i flew past this little structure right off the highway. when i headed back the other way that day i stopped to snap this picture. i never did understand its purpose for being there. there were no nearby signs for public transit or some such indication of its purpose. just one xs home.
and this reminded me today of how my access to it is now so much more removed. i can't just as easily hop on a bike and blast from my home out to hangtown and back on a sunday loop. and the fact that this has changed and all that goes with it continue to feel like a sort of death that i haven't fully processed. the bar across the street from where i work now is a constant hive of what my boss might call "transients". people like driftwood seem to move in and out of the place all day and night long. one of them even knocked my bike over the other day in an act of ignorance and carelessness.
and yet even as i considered the word "transient", isn't it what we all are? moving from one place to another, with and without purpose. whether we carry a 30 year mortgage or a duffel bag, we're just shuffling through this place. and somehow when i spot one of these little come outs from the weather it warms my heart.

we shoot the bull while
the glass between us empties
and time's strands wind down

raise a pint

time now to share one of my favorite new presents found under the Christmas tree this past year. 4 shiny new drinking glasses featuring marvel superheroes. i think my family must have known the loss of my old captain america glass and sought to replace it with some bonus companions! and i am very grateful for the gift, although i initially wondered about the criteria for this selection. most popular? biggest money maker? it certainly seems to me they might have done the distribution a little differently. perhaps a 50 year anniversary of the fantastic four for beginners? which could then be followed by a charter member avengers set in anticipation of the un-released film. and how about putting the wolverine into a set of other x-men?
but then i suppose this logic would eventually lead you into some questionable territory. i mean, i can see a world war 2 set with cap and bucky and maybe 2 more members of the old invaders group, or perhaps sarge fury and dum-dum? but if you try and group these heroes by their supporting characters, you might find yourself with thin choices. (who really wants a rick jones or thunderbolt ross glass?)
and this whole line of thought reminded me of the release of empire strikes back in 1980. back then the merchandising machine was just building up steam, and burger king won the rights to distribute special collector glasses for the film. each week a new character was featured on a collectible drinking glass available when you purchased a soft drink. our family didn't make the weekly trip to bk as some did, and so when we finally got there i was pretty excited at the chance to score one of these. i hoped for boba fett, and would have been happy with luke or the droids. but as fate would have it we ended up showing up on lando week. sorry billy dee. i sure didn't appreciate you then.
but i do appreciate these new additions to the cupboard, keeping the kitchen and kool-aid rations safe from evil doers. excelsior!

east shakes off west as
time ticks down and the tail wags
an old shrinking dog

mr. new year

first day of 2012 and what will we all find in it? the door to the answer remains locked for the present. the future is now. a very happy new year from the toastrobot!