go out and steal some kid's candy tonight...

back at the cabin again. the noise of solitude is soothing...

in the beginning
and through Him all things were made
and the word was God

be

40!

it's my baby's birthday today and she's officially joined the 40 club. i love you honey!

restoration

i was up in the mountains again this past weekend painting and i came across a couple of these wall plates around the cabin. at first i was going to just paint right over them again, but as i looked closer at one i noticed a little bit of the finish beneath. i unscrewed it from the wall and discovered that it was a really pretty brass plate. so i decided i'd try and strip the paint completely off it and see what revealed. i love doing little jobs like this. my friend todd has given me a deeper appreciation for it. taking something ordinary, and by just giving it a little attention and care, you can turn it into something beautiful. or maybe i should say return it. these turned out pretty good. it can take a little time and patience, and in the end i don't even think anyone will notice. but that's not really why i did it. the reward was the doing. it makes me want to look harder for these missed opportunities. so often we just pass them by, or paint right over them instead of seeing the real finish hidden beneath the surface.

take just a moment
surround yourself with good things
and pay off beauty

these days...

i was driving to the bay area today in my car listening to a little mix i'd put on my i pod. i don't often get a chance to listen to music in the car anymore because i'm usually on the bike. as i was listening it occurred to me that i'm at an age where most if not all of the most meaningful music in my life has already played. that's not to say i won't still continue to discover and enjoy new music, but i think the intensity of music during a certain time in my life has passed. i used to spot people who were twenty years out of high school still sporting the same look they had as teenagers and imagined they still cycled through all the same 8 tracks as well. now i guess it's happening to me. i used to dread the day i'd finally admit it to myself, but strangely i'm ok. i love music and i want to keep digging on new stuff, but i think it's ok to point to an era and say "that's my time. that was when i was hyper-aware. this is what helped form me. these are my influences." hopefully i won't have to endure some horrible pbs post punk reunion show someday.

something's coming...

go out and make your own message today...

trying hard to blend

he spreads his lies among us
expose the faker

my chest constrained by
tight steel bands will hold tight
or rip me apart

been working and staying up a lot lately. but tonight, i want to sleep like this...

take a good look at everything today and see if you notice anything different. things are not always what they seem.

it's sunday again. unplug to recharge.

memories quilted
as life experiences
are sewn together

24 hours in reno...

i went to reno yesterday for one of my freelance jobs. funny how close it really is to where i live. it only takes a couple hours to get there. and when i first get there it really doesn't seem to be that different on the surface. except for giant clown signs on the street and slot machines in the 7-11. but i realize after a while that i am actually in another state. it is different here. the rules are different. the people are a little different. and people come here from all over to live differently. we created a place where people can indulge. we built a city around desires and made it a tourist destination. in many ways it's a more honest place. a little seedier too. as i walked up to the entrance to my hotel it all looked so blown out. bright lights and the biggest little city. they had built a new facade on the front of the hotel. the old one was just a plain box, but the new one was like a tuscany nightmare complete with cheesy porticos and frescos and neon. but as you looked at it, you could clearly see that it was just an add-on. a face-lift. a distraction. still, we seem to love the distraction. maybe because it looks better close up than the real thing. viva.

i and me are a
contradiction split twins and
mirror opposite

see the rain outside
and put the radio on
tune into inside

small houses 03

location: 325 w154th ave., san leandro, ca
so this was my own "small house" project. back about five years ago when i was out of work, i was looking for something to do and i read this article in my wife's martha stewart magazine about these guys who build fishing sheds in minnesota. they pride themselves in keeping the price on these projects to a minimum by using a lot of found materials and then completing the look to reflect their taste. before i lost my job i came across this pile of lumber next door to where i worked. they were setting up a wine storage facility and had unloaded crates and crates of storage lockers outside. i asked what they planned to do with all the lumber and they said they were going to get a dumpster and toss it all. so, enter me with a work truck. that pile of lumber sat outside my house all winter, but when summer came along i put it to good use. i wanted to build a little house. a space defined by the constraints of budget and resource and skill. and i wanted it to be a space for nothing other than sitting in. like the little hut toshiro mifune bides his time in, in yojimbo. i've done some construction work before, but this was more like an art project. the only tools i used were a skilsaw and cordless drill. i was also inspired by the book wabi-sabi by leonard koren. he studied architecture, but the only thing he ever built was an eclectic tea house. all total i spent around forty bucks on this thing. and now i know when the chips are down, with a little time and patience i can afford shelter.

we wake to sabbath
there are no plans but resting
time for a selah

sidewalk ramps

in our old neighborhood in san leandro the sidewalks had these funky transitions from the street. the edge of the sidewalk rolled down at a sharp angle. this must have been before the practice of adding driveway ramps was common. not a big deal when you're pulling in with an old car that has a lot of ground clearance, but most newer cars tended to scrape a tailpipe or other part on the way in. we learned to avoid this by slowly pulling in at an angle, however i began to notice that quite a few people in the neighborhood had created their own sidewalk ramps. i started walking around to see how many i could locate and was fascinated at the different approaches people took. they say design arises out of a need, and here are some examples of a little yankee ingenuity addressing the need.

back to work chop chop
don't forget to wash your hands
swine flu is killing

senses alert me
something lurking down below
time to climb and find

tis the season...

life is funny in its rhythms. almost exactly ten years since i left a full time job in visual at macy's, i find myself once again back in a part-time freelance position traveling around northern california trimming christmas trees.
for a long time i didn't even want to set foot in a department store, i was so burnt out on retail and the preparations that lead up to and after the christmas holiday. in many ways it stole some of my joy from the season as i would come home and look at the traditional installments of decorating and gift buying as one more obligation related to my day job.
and now here in october, a month before most folk want to even think about seeing christmas trees, i am once again perpetuating the early push. and yet as i walk through the different stores, many i haven't been inside in years, there is a familiarity here. i can recall the day to day rhythms of a life i used to live so many years ago. there is a quietness in the morning hours i miss, when the store has not yet opened and only a portion of the lights are on. like working on a stage preparing the sets each morning before the doors to the theater open and the crowd shuffles in. taking time to consider projects, and then executing them with a variety of materials and a set number of constraints.
the people too, who i shared conversations with while rolling my cart out on to the floor and stopping to catch up for a minute. the camaraderie of other creative people of diverse background all with their own unique creativity and personal projects. i miss the solitude of the shop as my own work studio and meditation cell. and yes, i have to admit i have missed some of the sense that i was connected to a larger world of the now and the new.
so, even though the work is a little difficult sometimes, i'm hoping i can enjoy it now, in the moment, and reconnect a little with another layer from my past.

my exterior
texture formed by master's hand
now write on my wall

size matters not...

so we took our guys over to the mall yesterday to help in the build of an 8' yoda model. our local lego store put the event on and master builders were on hand to talk to the kids and give away prizes. and speaking of prizes, aaron won himself a bucket of legos for knowing what year the lego minifigure came on the scene. it was his second win in as many days as he had also won himself a dvd the day before at our local silver screen classic movie show. he answered what movie henry fonda won his only oscar for. well, maybe he had a little help from dad on these too. congratulations aaron.

staring at abyss
all are moving one by one
we will all go down

almost passed by but
a flower says i love you
stop and feel the love

lego dj

one of my photos was recently added to a flickr gallery with some other resident dj's. check out the house party. ah yeah.

skins!

"here's the album that young america has been asking for" from 1957 it's "skins! a bongo party with les baxter" eisenhower is still in office and the squares may rule, but all across the country the kids are getting hip to the new simplicity. and what could be simpler than banging on the drum? yes, we meet at the coffee shop to dig each others spoken word. we pull on our goatees and nod approvingly behind dark shades. then we hoof it in sandals back to our simple pads to drink wine on the floor out of chipped porcelain cups and rap some more. and then break out our drums and like howl. it doesn't matter if you don't have a decent set of skins. use anything to make the scene. pot, pan, wooden spoon. oatmeal container or slap the table man. and now you too can host your very own bongo bash. simply click the link to download and then go daddy-o!